court jokes

1) This one happened at the principal sessions court, Trichur, when Sri. Gopakumaran Nair was theHon: Judge. In one murder trial the defence lawyer was very much keen & adamant to see that I should give an answer to the question put forward by him as follows:- how much time it will take for the blood smear on the weapon to get completely dried up ? The Hon: judge prevented him from asking this question to an expert witness & more over the doctor is not the person to answer the question ;because it is depended on so many factors. But the defence won't give up. Finally the Hon: judge came with a solution. I will ask a question to you, If you can answer, the doctor will answer. The question goes like this." You are on a holiday all alone in your home. You are having a good quantity of clothes to wash. After the washing, you have put some clothes in the sun &some in the shade. When these two group will get completely dried up? The defence counsel had a very pathetic look & replied he can't".



2) In another case myself presented before the Principal sessions court, Kassargode. Hon: Judge Sir. James was the presiding officer. During trial the prosecution showed me a dried small branch of a tree to know whether this could produce injuries on the extremities (# of forearm & leg bones). I told him it can produce these injuries in its" original state". The judge was frowning his forehead for few seconds & suddenly began to laugh with stamping his feet on the ground& clapping his hands. He was asking the Public prosecutor whether you followed the answer. He made a comment" YOU ARE THE REAL POLICE SURGEON". What I meant was at this stage the twig is a dried peace of wood & it will only break if used with force. In its original state means when it is fresh.
After hearing the comment I was in an elated mood & answering questions put forward by both advocates. When everything was over the Hon judge was making a comment again. You have given answers to the questions put forward by both prosecutor & defence & after hearing your answers I am having certain doubts to clarify. You can get down from the defence box only after clearing all my doubts. By hearing this I felt a little bit perplexed & confused. On total I have spent more than four hrs in the witness box.
3) In another sessions case at Trichur The defence lawyer did not get any answers as anticipated to those questions put forward in his favor. At last he made a comment " your opinion as to cause of death is not correct" I replied back " in that case I would request the learned defence counsel to give a correct answer so that I will be benefited in future".

Dr.N.Rajaram